Hi! My name is Amanda Farr Knickerbocker. I started this blog as a way to chronicle my daughter’s stay in the NICU. Mostly, I just didn’t want to answer the question, “So, how’s she doing?” one more stinking time. (I was asked it a lot.)
In a moment of desperation, about nine weeks into our NICU stay, I reached out to a NYTimes journalist, Lisa Belkin. She writes the Motherlode, which is a parenting blog in the NYTimes. And she’s wonderful. For some reason, she listened to my desperate plea to be heard and she ran a post about Charlotte.
After that, people started to read our blog. And then they told people about it. And then they kept coming back. Again and again. And I saw how desperate they were, or had been at one time. I could see how much these parents wanted to understand. Wanted to know that someone else understood what it meant to be a preemie parent.
I hope that this can be a place where parents, friends, and family come to gain a better understanding of prematurity. I hope it can be a place where parents in the NICU say to their friends and family, “I know you don’t understand what we are going through, but here, read this site, it explains our lives right now.”
I hope this can be a place where preemie parents can turn to, in the middle of the night (or during the day, for you normal people) and find someone who can give voice to their emotions. Their fears, their hopes, their pain and their joy.
This will not always be this place I dream of. I’m nowhere near perfect at expressing and explaining this life. Beside that point, I am only one person. Any other preemie parent might feel completely differently than I do.
But that’s OK. And that’s the point. Anything you feel right now, it’s totally legitimate. Please know that. Your feelings are valid. They are real. And hopefully, they help you to understand prematurity a little more.